Greetings and blessings to you, mortals!

From all corners of the globe you have streamed together, crossed glowing deserts, struck you through dark jungles, swam through deep oceans, paid ridiculous tolls for alpine passes and always kept to the StVO. The Lord likes it. Now you are pushing here in the forum, full of expectation and humility. You renounced all earthly benefits, sternly fasted, conquered the burning thirst with spiritual upliftment, shunned the carnal temptations, crushed the golden calf, chased away the spirits and demons, resisted Satan, the corporeal. The Lord is smiling. And now the day has come for which you have all waited for your life to date, the day, the event, the enlightenment, the conception of the blessed words. Today you receive the commandments of the Lord, for he is the Logos, and he brings order into chaos. Chiseled forever in stone (well, not really ... but digital is also very nice) are the rules that we want to live forever ... Hosiannah!

The 11 Commandments

1. Thou shalt not speak evil against thy neighbor or second neighbor, or ...

We're all no longer cavemen who slurp each other in the fight over the mammoth tax. We are all crass civilized members of one or the other high culture. At least we mean. But sometimes we live verbally in the Neanderthal, and here and there they like to get the wordcock out, right? No of course not. We do not want to do that, we do not. We maintain as pleasant as possible, do not give any animal names (unless the other person explicitly asks ...) and do not speculate about the brain volume of others ... instead, we always count to 30 before we open our mouths and save with harsh words. Please, please with sugar on top of it! Let love prevail!

2. Those who walk among you to disturb the logo, be damned !!!

For this see also Meyers Conversationslexicon of 1871: "Troll, the, plural -e: ugly gray-green figure with tiny little testicles suffers because of the latter to inferiority complexes and lives them either in the fairy tale world or in forums disturbing Will, attention, but get instead, only on the cap, in the fairytale world of noble knight in golden armor, in forum of admin or mod with golden extinguishing finger, evolutionarily related to the weed, therefore can not extinct. "

So far as all is said, we add that trolls have only one purpose here, as a reason for the "delete entry" button. In addition, her life expectancy here is lower than that of a box of chocolates in the nursery. And we do not argue, we erase them all, for the Lord will know his own. Incidentally, "Troll" also includes those who want to live out their aversions against the Hansa Park or theme parks in general. This is a Hansa Park forum (we did not choose the domain because "knitting pattern forum" was already occupied ...) and who has nothing constructive to say, can go to hell or crumble into another park and count nonstop garbage cans, or just enjoy the hustle and bustle here.

3. Thou shalt not provoke the archangels of the Lord, that their wrath may not come upon thyself

In the forum, the sheep of the Lord cavort, post, laugh, graze and discuss peacefully. But now and then a nasty black sheep sneaks under her and tries to disturb the heavenly peace. But then the gates of heaven open, and surrounded by dark clouds, the avengers of the Lord armed with fire-blades and blanks (members of the team, Ed. Verse.) Rush to the earth, where they unleash the divine wrath seven days and seven nights long. And there will be great lamentation among the black sheep when their inappropriate contributions are erased, and they will blaspheme "freedom of speech" and "censure" whine, and yet it will bring nothing. For inexorable are the legions of the archangels, and they have little appetite for their long discussions. Because the Lord says: that's good.

And for all sheep who do not understand this: Members of the team can and will always delete inappropriate posts, edit inappropriate places and permanently ban disturbing users. And there's no need for discussion, because that's her job.

4. Thou shalt not be talkative as wives, for it is a cruel to the Lord

Spamming the forum is undesirable for several reasons (divine will, space, and abstract aesthetics). Anything that ends up in superfluous garbage in the forum will be disposed of as quickly as possible by the diligent Mainzelmännchen of the team and fed to environmentally friendly digital composting.

5. Thou shalt walk in the ways of the Lord, and thou shalt not forsake her, thou shalt depart,

because stony and thorny is the banquet

Basically, nothing is closer than throwing in the thread to the curse of Novgorod briefly a detailed presentation of the last Tokyo hotel concert - and yet, or just because, we do not love this. I think we all understood the point? Bueno. If you can not find a suitable place for your favorite topics, please make a thread yourself. Saves general confusion and reduces the heart rate of the team enormously.

6. You shall use the signs of the Lord, the holy comma and the blessed point, for the Lord has given them to us!

Honestly, we stand on punctuation marks. Really. Some members of the team, whose name I will not name here, are so punctuated that they meet once a week in a fetish club, where they do all kinds of dirty things with oversized foam rubber replicas of punctuation marks, which I do not elaborate here would like to. Punctuation makes us totally horny. And by the way, they also make your sentences readable, facilitate understanding, provoke answers and increase the salvation of the soul in general. So use it while it's still allowed.

7. For the Lord will know his own ...!

All who post here should know that, among other things, we store the IP address of the sender, and if they suspect criminal offenses also gladly and quickly and free of charge passed on to the law enforcement and similar unpleasant things entrusted executive organs of this republic.

8. Thou shalt not speak in pagan riddles, for the wizards are cursed!

The first thing Otto Normaluser gets to see from every thread is the TITLE. That's the headline, so to speak. Now if you create such a thread, then you CAN (if you are very smart and witty) choose a title that says something about the content of the thread. It would be awesome, right? But apparently not everyone, because lithe thread titles like "Help!" or "HiLFE !!! 11111eineinseins" or "Frage" or "need helpee111!" or "have a question!" are still very popular. Absolute classics in a theme park forum are of course explicitly meaningful thread titles such as "rollercoaster", "ne ne question about Novgorod", "Novgorod" or "Novogard" ... no comment ... anyway, such titles can smell suspiciously like garbage, and then: see above.

And if one has managed to attract the attention of one or the other user, it increases the chance of useful answers to one's own question quite clearly, if one gives from the outset certain important background information, and clearly formulated his question ("What does me anyway? "). The icing on the cake is then the ability to choose the right area, because there are not only "general" but also such specialized stories as "other parks", "attractions" or even the shows.

9. You should honor the search function because it is blessed

We know that it is usually more cumbersome to use the search function than just quickly clapping the question into a thread for the umpteenth time. But it is much easier for the others, annoyed by this question for the hundred thousandth time users much easier just "search function !!" or "SuFu, you ass !!!" instead of answering the question for the umpteenth time. So please, use the sacred search feature. Blessings on you.

10. Thou shalt help, for the helper is the kingdom of heaven.

Regardless of the above function, we sincerely and intrusively ask every user to help with any questions they may have. No matter how feeble a question or how obvious the answer appears, people ask because they want an answer. And "Google" is not necessarily an answer. So take your time, write and help. In addition, it should be noted that the questioner (s) are not necessarily Hapa-Ultras. A little clear language, avoiding excessive accumulations of typical abbreviations and understanding of ambiguities (the average citizen does not necessarily know the difference between Euro-Fighter and Hyper-Coaster) is helpful here.

11. Thou shalt honor the woman, that it may be well for you, and that thou longest live on the earth

Chivalry is a virtue that we would like to cultivate. And among the chivalry is, among other things, a decent appearance compared to the pretty sex. So, if a user "outed" yourself as a female, please, even if it is difficult to give up on effusions on topics such as "women have lost nothing in coaster counten" or "quota women". Thank you and such. Besides, we do not like it when every female being is immediately spammed with open PMs and will take quite chivalrous countermeasures. We are not an AdultContactChatRoom, but a theme park forum.

Appendix: Thou shalt fear El Pollo Diablo, for his wrath is cruel

The latest scientific findings indicate that the operator of this forum is in league with a fearsome 2-meter devil's fowl and this rushes to any jammer who does not abide by the above rules. This is supported by reliable statistical surveys, according to which the last words of 86.3% of the prematurely dropping interferers are "Madre de Dio! El Pollo Diablo !!!!!!"

You got the message.

We thank the Bundeswehrforum for permission to use and modify these rules.